bald

It doesn’t really make any sense to pursue the adjunct professor at a row boat rally. I mean what do you hope to gain? The professor only got that way by being practical, and there’s more than enough water to get in over one’s neck. I suppose that’s something to consider, but who wants to carry a life jacket through the rain? I mention rain, because it is raining again, and it it bringing us all down, in the sense that we’re not up, or out, or open in the case of the hair salon that doesn’t do Fridays. To mention this, I know seems a bit underwhelming, but there is a lack of wig materials out there and an over-acceptance of balding nations. I think that painting can put a lot of thought into that, but in order to begin, you must release the little parts that connect to the wood. What if you have a balding brush? Does your work suffer, does it make it more self-conscious? Or is your stick of thinning bristles more liberated by the breezy air that no longer mocks its moistened tips? I don’t think I want to find out as there are many ways to pretend to hold paint between your teeth, but very few excuses that you can give your dentists when they ask what the other one said on the subject of Crest vs. Colgate. There is very little that they can do, except to take in all of the samples and pretend that they’ll never run out of them before retirement hits and they’re forced to pay for it like the rest of us. What if there were balding toothbrushes? This cannot bode well for the plaque laden teeth, too flashy to have sympathy for their less haired conspirators? I mean, if you don’t have many bristles on your brush, there are very few things that people are going to look past to find the real you. Maybe you have a deep colored handle, or maybe your shape fits exactly the place between the wall and the sink where a contact lens fell, but this is probably unlikely. The best chance you have is to be thrown into the cleaning supplies bin in the hopes that Comet may be sprinkled upon you one day and you’ll be called upon to clean the underside of a toilet bowl. If you’re a balding toothbrush, your four out of five doctor recommendation is going to take a huge hit in the credibility department. You’ll be called an airline brush, a Halloween mistake, or worse yet, a British Brush, lacking in both reach and resilience when searching for the mighty molars of the Queen’s rancid lot. No, a balding anything can be bad, unless your an American Eagle, and even then, you don’t need the word bald in your title to be recognized. A hat was not created for you, implants were not created for you. You can fly majestically, toothbrushless, paint brushless and most importantly, hair free…until of course you run into a balding gun owner that isn’t afraid to pay a hefty fine if he’s caught trying to add you to his trophy tower. I can’t imagine why you would be a good prize, but then again there’e not much standing in the way of what I imagine, hair none.

-pmd